Chapter One

1. Brands Are like People

Strange-looking machines filled the room. They beeped and whirred, casting a greenish glow onto the walls. Tubes and wires ran across the floor like the back room at Radio Shack. A two-year-old boy lay dying in a hospital bed in Denver. He was in a coma. The doctors had just told his mother the boy was not likely to pull through. She broke down. Her pain was made even more intense because her father, the child’s grandfather, was a thousand miles away on a business trip in Los Angeles.

When the grandfather got the news, he rushed to the airport to catch the first flight to Denver. Arriving at the terminal, the security lines were so long he feared he wasn’t going to make his flight. He begged the TSA agents to let him cut to the front of the line, but they refused. He waited in line with everyone else.

Once he made it through security, the grandfather sprinted to the departure gate. But the door was already closed. The flight had finished boarding and was preparing for takeoff. What happened next stunned him.

“Are you Mark Dickinson?”

He turned and saw the gate agent looking at him.

“Yes. I’m Mark Dickinson.”

The gate agent opened the door to the jetway and said, “We’re holding the plane for you.”

As Dickinson walked down the jetway, he saw a man wearing a pilot’s uniform waiting for him. The pilot said, “Mr. Dickinson, I’m sorry about your grandson. This plane can’t go anywhere without me, and I wasn’t going anywhere without you. Now relax. We’ll get you there. And again, I’m so sorry.”

I first heard this story when a friend of mine was telling me about it. As he relayed the details to me, he failed to mention the name of the airline. I said, “Just curious, was that Southwest Airlines?”

My friend said, “Yes, of course it was.” It was almost a foregone conclusion, like we didn’t even need to ask. That’s because the compassionate treatment of customers fits exactly with Southwest’s brand.

Southwest is a company I really admire because they show up with a consistent set of beliefs that I understand and can see on display in their interactions with customers. The values and beliefs of Southwest are very clear. They have branded love and respect in air travel.

I see these values play out in the story about the grandfather rushing to see his dying grandson. I see it in their advertising, branding, and marketing. It’s in their customer service. It’s in the happy, upbeat, lighthearted attitude of the flight attendants and flight crew. It even comes through in things like free drink coupons. They have a cute little message printed on them about love and happiness.

The company’s message is consistent. It radiates through everything they do and all customer touchpoints. If I close my eyes, I imagine the Southwest Airlines brand as a living, breathing human with a big, beating heart who wants to give me a warm, squishy hug. I love that.

Brands Really Are like People

Brands really are like people. More specifically, the brand-customer relationship is analogous to a romantic relationship between two people. First they meet, they become interested in each other, and there is a courtship. Then they begin to date each other exclusively, and eventually, they fall into a well-worn routine of contentment and comfort and being together. That is, until one of them cheats or screws up in some major way.

The relationship between brands and customers is very similar. When you enter into a relationship with another person, you’re looking for someone with whom your core values are aligned, someone with similar foundational beliefs. Part of the process of dating and courtship is figuring out if those values do in fact align. And you can learn a lot about someone’s values on just one date.

First dates can be a little awkward. The conversation is usually stilted and superficial. You never discuss anything too deep. But you can still learn a lot about the other person’s values and belief system. Does the man offer to pick up the check? Does the woman offer to split the check? Is either person rude or condescending to the wait staff? What does each person order? Are they health-conscious and disciplined, or do they lack willpower and self-control? Does the man hold the door for the woman? Does the woman get angry if the man holds the door for her? All these actions speak volumes about a person’s values.

The process of courtship is like peeling back the layers of an onion. You slowly get past the tough outer layers until you reach the juicy core values. This is where you get deep into topics, such as children, family, parenting, money, goals, politics, and religion, to name a few. Slowly, the values and belief system of the other person come into focus, and their actions and behaviors start to make sense.

The way people behave, what they say, what they do, how they act, how they engage with other people—in all of those things, you see evidence of values and beliefs. The same is true of a brand. The values and beliefs of a brand drive their actions. The story of the Southwest pilot who held the plane is consistent with that brand’s values. I was not surprised when I heard the story. In contrast, when you see a brand behave in a way that is not consistent with their values, it’s surprising, even jarring. In many cases, it’s disappointing or hurtful.

You have values and beliefs as a brand. Whether you like it or not, they are there. Even if a brand hasn’t gone through the process of articulating specifically what those values and beliefs are, they are on display for everyone to see with every interaction they have with your brand. It doesn’t matter how much clever marketing, advertising, or branding you’re doing; if your brand isn’t living, breathing, and acting according to your values and beliefs, your brand is broken.

If you don’t care for my dating analogies, think of the brand-customer relationship this way. A brand is like a magnet. Just like magnets only attract certain types of metal, a brand is designed to attract certain types of customers who share beliefs and values similar to those of the people and organization behind the brand.

For example, Duluth Trading Company is a clothing brand that knows exactly who their customers are, and they market directly to them. Their customers are fiercely loyal. I know this because when I’m speaking or doing seminars, I always ask the audience which brands they are irrationally loyal to, and Duluth Trading comes up all the time.

Duluth Trading’s marketing features a humorous, down-home, midwestern working-man-style irreverence that perfectly fits the audience. Duluth is a relaxed brand for hard working people. Duluth is sort of like the Prairie Home Companion of clothing retailers. They tap into the inner construction worker in all of us. Their website has slogans like, “You only have one butt, don’t freeze it off.” Their Fire Hose work pants have the slogan, “Tougher than an angry beaver’s brood.” And all Duluth products come with their famous No Bull guarantee. Head to DuluthTrading.com and read some of their marketing. You’ll see what I mean.

The Emotional Bank Account

In any good relationship, over time, you want to build up equity in the emotional bank account. This happens when you clearly express your values and beliefs, and then consistently behave in a way that’s aligned with those stated values and beliefs. Being in consistent alignment with those values means that in every action, every word, every touchpoint, those values shine through.

Think about the people in your life that you love and cherish. You know them so well they are totally predictable, right? You know what they believe and what they value. You know how they will behave in a given situation. That’s one of the reasons you love them—because you can predict how they’re going to treat you, you like how they treat you, you admire them, you feel close to them, you feel invested in their success, and you know you can depend on them. You are confident that they have your back and that they won’t let you down. As a result, they become an important, indispensable part of your life.

Brands also build loyalty this way. They are clear about what they stand for. They are consistent in their actions. And eventually, they become meaningful and indispensable to their customers.

Self-Expressive Benefits

The best relationships are the ones that elevate a person’s self-concept. When I am with the man that I love, I feel like I’m on top of the world. Whatever stupid thing I did or failed to accomplish that day is completely okay. Conversely, whatever achievement I have made feels that much greater when we’re together. If I bake cookies or make dinner, he will tell me how delicious they are. He elevates my self-concept. The same is true of a great...